Friday, July 19, 2013

The 5 Mean Girls I Hate at the Airport

guess what i'm doing today.

no guess.

k, whatever. i'm flying to NYC to see justin timberlake and jay z at yankee stadium.

no shit. isn't that the coolest thing ever? don't get too excited, my layover at DCA is only 40 mins so i'm probably not going to make it but i feel like the attempt is super cool.

then saturday morning i'm flying to atlanta for manfriend's best friend's wedding.

4 flights, 24 hours.

which leads me to: the 5 people i hate at the airport. mean girls style.

1. the gretchen weiners. that airport seatmate who has EVERYTHING and doesn't mind showing it off. do i see your new vera bradley weekender? yes, yes i do. do i note that you have an ipad, kindle, and iphone? i sure do.  this is also the girl who is reapplying her full makeup in the airport bathroom. it doesn't matter if your lipstick is fresh gretchen, you're still not going to make fetch happen.

2. the karen. you know the person who is like: excuse me does this big aluminum device i'm in fly? yes, karen it does. also, karen, you can't just get up and walk around at any time, they WILL tell you to sit down. yes, they are still telling you to return to your seat.. still. it's the person who you feel like you're talking to a chia pet when having a conversation with. it's karen.

3. the regina george. this girl is just a big asshole. they are the one in the security line who is questioning why they have to remove their belt or holding up the line because they brought in their smart water and don't understand why they can't. i hate you regina. why didn't you just make everything 3 oz like the rest of us?

4. the janis ian. the loud seatmate. the weird one. the quirky one when you just don't want to effing deal with quirk, you know? stop being so effing weird janis and just let me listen to my macklemore album.

5. the cady heron. this is the one. who you think is a cool, nice, normal girl and you think "sweet, someone normal" as you sit down, and then over their shoulder you see them texting their besties about how they're sitting next to a girl in an ugly maxi skirt (me).
cady, you're just a mean. girl.

wish me luck today making JT my other manfriend. what types of people do you hate at the airport?

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  1. I hate the bitchy flight attendant who hates her life and gives you the dirtiest state of all time if your carryon is sticking out from underneath the seat...

    1. Ah! Agreed! On our flight to Vegas we asked for an extra water or something and we got like "i wanna kill you" eyes from the flight attendant lady. Sheesh...

      PS Katie... have a fun time at your concert!! So jealous!

  2. Also why is your life so cool?

  3. haha, these are great! my best girl friend is going to that concert this evening too, I bet it's going to be amazing!

  4. this is genius. also, yea. why is your life so cool?

  5. Have the best time! I love ATL so I hope you get a chance to explore if you haven't been there a million times already!

  6. this is hilarious. and airports really bring out the shit heads in people! have so much fun at the concert..I am incredibly jealous!

  7. This. THIS. Omg I love this post. Spot on. And good luck with all the flights! Tell JT I say hello.

  8. I somehow always manage to run into these people DESPITE going to the airport at 4am for the express purpose of avoiding them. Womp. Also yaaay welcome to my city!!! If you were staying longer I'd probably stalk you a little bit....enjoy the concert!

  9. how dare she call your maxi skirt ugly!!! HOW DARE SHE. also, tell my BF JT that I miss him and can't wait to see him when he gets done touring.

  10. Hahaha this cracked me up!! I had to go through 3 airports last week and definitely ended up sitting next to a Janis Ian...who was a middle-aged man...and he just decided to tell me how he was up all night because he negotiates in hostage situations, and I'm all, "Cool?" It kind of was...but still random and weird.

  11. So jealous of your life right now. I was all excited to get a haircut this weekend. Now that seems pretty lame, haha! Have a great time!

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